i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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