I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
