the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
