dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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