is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
