Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
