Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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