And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
