it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
he was CRYING into my vagina
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
