I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
