and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
