she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
