waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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