I just cut my nipple shaving
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
