All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize