So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
