you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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