just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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