She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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