so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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