Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
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