If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
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