i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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