Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
