Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
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