Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i already hear my dad disowning me
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize