I wish I could punch you in the face.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
