Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
