i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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