yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize