i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize