Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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