im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
and she was petting her beer can
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
