Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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