he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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