Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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