this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize