worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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