Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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