Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize