She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize