i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
