I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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