Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize