She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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