Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
