Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i would punch a child for taco bell
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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