I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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