you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize