no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
